Bronnie Ware, a palliative nurse from Australia, asked many of her dying patients and she listed this as their biggest regret. Ware took care of patients in their last three to twelve weeks of life, she heard many stories and confessions from them all. Listening to their regrets moved her so much that she actually wrote a bestselling novel about it called “The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.” In the book, she said many of her patients had not honored even half of the dreams they wanted to fulfill. This caused them to have major regrets before the end of their life.
If one of your wishes is to start an online course, be it to
- share your knowledge from wherever you sit
- create a passive income
- do something you have not done before
- help people have a better outcome
- reach out to people all over the world
or (usually) all of them at the same time, what is it that keeps you from creating that course?
You might say that you do not have the time right now, and you will get to it later. But is that really true? Will you get to it later or will you find another excuse later?
So, what keeps you from doing this course, sharing your gift?
Well, you know that on one hand, there is love, love puts us in harmony with us and the world. To simplify, let’s just say that if you come from love, you come from the “good” place.
Now, is there a “bad” place and what would that be? Often people think the “opposite” of love is hate or division. It is actually FEAR. Fear is the emotion that underlies everything which separates you from who you really are and from the others.
Fear is the also what separates you from what you really want to do and become.
Love is a powerful motivator, so is fear.
Just think of it for a moment. Go over your past life and see what motivated certain actions (or non-actions) in your life. You will see that you can always bring it down to either love or fear.
How can you control that fear and eventually replace it by love so that you are able to follow your dream (which in this case would be building your course)?
1. Become Aware
- I have no time = I am afraid to commit to that path
- I am not enough of an expert = I am afraid to be judged
- I don’t know how to do this = I am afraid of a new challenge
- Who would listen to me = I am afraid to be rejected
Fear is so a powerful, it keeps you right where you are. It makes you believe that there is danger out there, life-threatening danger. When we are confronted with life-threatening danger, our ability to think is impaired, our reptilian brain takes over, the survival instinct kicks in. We have 3 possibilities: Fight, Flight or Freeze.
In this particular situation, we freeze. We do not want to move into that perceived danger zone. But read perceived. There is no danger and as soon as you become aware of it, you can change it.
2. Have courage (it won't kill you)
Fear keeps us alive. People who are not at all afraid quickly risk to take themselves out of the gene pool. Fear helps us survive. It made our ancestors avoid sabre tigers or stay clear of deep dark waters. Being afraid of everything keeps us from living.
Take the time and go over all those situations where fear kicked in unnecessarily.
Do it without judgement, be kind to yourself but be honest. How often did you really want something but did not go for it because you were afraid? I recall situations like that back to kindergarten. Let me tell you one story, it might underline my point.
It was after class and my older brother came to pick me up. It was him, me and the kindergarten teacher. She wanted to give me one of these paper dolls, I wanted it so badly, she was handing it to me from behind her desk. It was right there, 3 steps away. I could not take those steps. I hoped my brother would get it for me or the teacher would come bring it. I was just frozen. 3 steps away from what, at that moment, was my biggest wish.
As you can imagine, after a while, my brother took me and we walked out without the doll. I was so disappointed, angry with my brother, angry with the teacher, eventually angry with myself.
Most of us are only 3 steps away of what we really wish. Most of us expect someone else to take these 3 steps for us. It does not work that way. We have to take them, we have to break this spell that keeps us frozen. (Stop waiting for Prince Charming).
The best way to get out of your lethargy is to move. If you do not do it yet, start moving. This helps you get out of your head, where fear mounts up into real life. Soon you realize there is nothing to be afraid of. Get your body moving. Walk, swim, run, workout, do any kind of exercise that gets you out of your head, into your body. You might wonder why exercise has anything to do with building an online course.
On a physical level, exercise produces endorphins, chemicals in the brain that help reduce stress which you have since you are not doing what you want to do.
Also, the fact that you got up to do those exercise, creates a behavioral pattern that will help you get up and work on your course. "Just Do It" is the motto here, and as I mentioned before, YOU have to do it. Nobody will show up and do it for you.
Point 4 and 5 are more directed to the course building itself, so far you could implement the tips for any trouble you are facing, here we focus on your course.
Write down your idea and what you need to do to make it happen. You will see, as soon as you have it on paper it looks doable. Bringing your thoughts on paper is like the first step to bringing them into reality, giving birth to the idea. This is a very crucial and profound measure. It is the first step to getting organized and plan your work. Write down what needs to be done, the course of action that needs to be taken, That is a powerful tool to take control of your emotions and counter the fear.
It leads to the next point because it allows you to take action.
5. Take Action
As soon as you start taking action, you do not have time to think about all you are afraid of. Stage fright is before you get on the stage. As soon as the actor performs, there is no fear, there is action, there is flow. I used to play in a small theater and I was very anxious before we started and as soon as I was in the play, I just move with what came to me. Even when my partner changed the line or said my part, I just weaved it into the story and went with it.
You take what life throws at you and use it. This is only possible when you are in action, only now you are creating.
I would suggest that you stop giving into your fears and start taking action. You can get the first 3 steps to your course here for FREE. Try them out, see where it gets you and take it from there.
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